This one’s for all the Christian Teen Ministry Leaders…
I’ve been working in youth ministry for years, and I currently run a fellowship group out of my home, filled with rambunctious, honest to goodness teens from all walks on the faith trail. We have more girls than boys, but the few boys that do come are a significant and consistent part of the group. I love this group of kids. Oh, how I do.
I didn’t plan on running this ministry, but apparently God did and I complied. That’s the thing about serving– if you open your eyes to the needs around you and have a heart and a passion for what you see-
If you step out of your comfortable place and make the offer, God will do the rest.
This happens all the time.
It’s how God moves mountains.
So anyway, this last month the boys couldn’t make the group due to traveling. And as far as I knew, there would be no other guest appearances (Kids are ALWAYS welcome to bring friends/boyfriends/neighbors, etc), so I wanted to focus on the intimate and sometimes uncomfortable topics of sex, modesty and purity.
Good stuff.
I mean, any teen wants to talk about all that jazz in a group, right?
Especially a Christian ministry group.
And man, it’s every ministry leader’s dream to approach such subjects.
I’m sure.
Here’s what I want every teen ministry leader to know:
YOU MUST TALK ABOUT THESE THINGS.
I fear too many Christian organizations are turning their heads the other way, avoiding the unavoidable, silencing the epidemic that is taking over the culture of our youth, simply because this topic is a threat to the Christian message. That this risky discussion may open up the gateway to sin and God forbid we open the door and allow dangerous and damaging ideas into our innocent and protected cherubs’ minds. And then there’s the obvious: The conversation around sex is controversial and uncomfortable at best.
Oh dear me, we need to get over it and do the hard thing.
We need to all take a deep prayerful breath and…
Go there.
Because they’re there.
Please continue reading this important message over at Her View From Home. (Click HERE to read it.) To support this idea, please share on social media so other teen ministry leaders can read it too.
Chris, I commend your courage and willingness to go into the sticky places with the young people you mentor and support. These conversations are desperately needed in these times. Go with God as you help them navigate these tricky waters with God’s Word as their guide. Tight hugs, Alison
Alison, thank you so very much for your encouragement and support! It means the world to me. <3
Hugs right back.
Well, you are absolutely right, Chris! I loved your piece on talking to your teen about sex. I really didn’t do a very good job on this. I could have used your advice way back when. I think the topic could be rather fun in a group setting and the kids would probably feel more comfortable with it coming from their teen minister and not from their parents.
I think it’s a difficult subject to approach with our kids, and my group of teens really seemed very comfortable with the discussion. 🙂 When one of the kids said that no one ever talks about it, that struck me. It really must be talked about! I SO appreciate your support, Lisa! Thank you, friend. <3
I couldn’t agree more. Sometimes we bring more harm than good because we refuse conflict or we avoid confrontation.
So true Lux! Avoidance gets us nowhere. And our teens NEED our guidance and support in these very difficult and controversial situations they experience. I appreciate you reading it and responding!
I so so so agree. I’d even say that we should start talking about it even earlier. Not inappropriate earlier, but age-appropriate discussions. I mean even at six, seven, and eight, they talk about having “girlfriends” and “boyfriends” and I don’t think they know what that means. Tucker asks about babies and if he’ll have a wife one day… oy.
I’ve been leading our teen Sunday School. I often wonder how that happened! I’m not sure if I’ll be able to broach the tricky subjects during our Sunday morning discussions. You’re right though that someone needs to be having these discussions with our youth.
**If you step out of your comfortable place and make the offer, God will do the rest**
Go there.
Yes.
Your study must be dynamic and FABULOUS))
Can I come? xxx
As a Christian mental health therapist, this is a topic that I talk about almost on a daily basis with both my teenage clients as well as with parents of teens. Sex is become so normalized as opposed to the beautiful gift that God gave a husband and wife to share. With the teens I try to focus on how when we do things differently than God’s design there are consequences – emotional pain, potential physical pain, etc. I go through multiple examples, not just sex, on how that is true. Using other instances in their life of how they went against God’s design and had hardships can be helpful. It’s not just a bunch of adults being prudes but a loving adult who cares for them heart, body, and soul!