In our family, we set out on a mission to build character and instill faith in our children. When the kids were little, it was all about keeping them fed and safe from harm. We were immersed in changing diapers, and teaching them how to eat and speak and walk. The functioning is at it’s peak during those critical years of development, as we bundle our little ones to protect them from the cold and rock them to sleep- the basic fundamentals are laid before us.
But as the years roll along, our children need a different set of rules. Our kids can understand the need to go by all the systems and standards of their home, school, activities and sports that infiltrate their lives. All areas promote valuable lessons and powerful messages to behave, succeed, and belong.
Be kind and polite. Use good teamwork and communication. Study and be mindful. Plan well and schedule. Responsibility is key. And in order for our kids to succeed in all areas of their life, they must be grounded in the values we hold as a family. Our home base is where we set the foundation for everything else in their lives. If our children don’t have rich soil to plant their seeds, how will they grow to be a vital person with endless potential and purpose? Kids can surely follow the rules of this world, but I want more. I want my kids to honor why we follow such rules. I want them to dig deep and stretch far and see beyond the guidelines of life.
As the kids get older, our house rules transform into even greater expectations of who they are and what they do. We place our values in the heart of our home, as we help our kids grow into the person God intended them to be. We want to ground them in confidence, nurture them through love, and raise them with respect. We are passionate about their hearts behind the rules, their intentions beyond their behavior, and their beliefs about their faith. If we miss out on this critical time to invest in discovering what defines them, I fear they may live their lives void of meaning. So we hold tight to the under-layers of the ‘whys’ and carefully dig in to what really matters.
Our home embraces and encourages such things:
Honesty.
Grace.
Responsibility.
Sacrificial love.
Faith.
Giving.
Dream Big.
I am over at 1Corinthians13 parenting today talking about our house rules and why we set them. I would love for you to come by and share yours as well. Parenting is all about the process, and in it we all grow. What are your house rules? Come read our house rules.
Aww, heading over and I think we are very much on the same page with this for house rules and definitely not a shocker as I think we are similar in this way and so much more 🙂
Totally agree Janine!! I love that we are so much alike!! XOXO
I really love this post. It’s an awesome reminder to keep up “the good fight” in trying to raise my daughter to be the person God has intended for her to be. Great affirmation.
Thank so much Andrea! You nailed it- Keep up “the good fight”. 🙂
I absolutely LOVE your rules for your house. Can I steal them for mine? :)-Ashley
Girl- you can steal anything from me!!! 😉 Glad you like them. I’m betting that you have similar ones anyway. XO
Beautiful. Heading over now 🙂
Aw! Thanks so much Kerri! 🙂
Thanks so much Kerri!!
Those are great rules. I am doing the best I can to nurture my children in the same way as you. I never realized how challenging that could be with all of the outside influences. But I am their mother, not their friend.
It’s amazing how the world has such an influence on the kids… BUT- I am thankful that so far? My kiddos *see* how broken it is, and believe in all the values we take so very seriously in our home. They get it!
Will see about the teen years…
Praying about THAT now. 🙂
Will go head over now…I like what you’ve written here already though!
Aw! Thanks sweet friend!! 🙂
Great set of rules! It’s so important to have guidelines to keep kids grounded!
Thanks Roshni! If we don’t plant a firm foundation IN our kids, I fear they will let the world define them- instead of our family’s values. I simply can’t let that happen.
Your house rules sound similar to ours… can’t wait to read! Headed over now!
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
I’m sure we hold the same standards and values, my friend! And I just love that. 🙂
Your house rules are pretty similar to ours (although I can’t say they always get followed). Headed over to read now.
Well, getting followed? That’s a whole-nother post!! LOL
I loved reading all about your house rules.
One of our simple ones is that no one can say “I don’t like this.” I find it rude when I’ve gone to the trouble to cook something. Instead, we say “it’s not my favorite.” The nice thing about it is that even though I know what it means when they boys say it (and sometimes I’m the one saying it about a meal I made) – if they are in public and someone brings something up about a particular food it doesn’t sound so harsh.
I love that Kim! 🙂
Love your house rules, Chris. It’s such a challenge to keep focused on the simple stuff at times, but it’s worth the work.
To me, it’s all about the depth behind the rules. That takes work. But it’s worth it!! I know you have the same goals with your boys. 🙂
Well I can’t wait to read more! Our house rules sound like your house rules. Of course Des being two.. doesn’t get as much as Scarlet does, but there are fundamental things they really DO get.
And it’s good.
And as they get older and grow more with those rules, they will get more. I love that our rules are so much alike Tamara!! 😉
You know, I’ve been wanting to do some kind of visual art – if you will – that would cover the House Rules. And the ones you have picked are perfect. I just want something so that they can see: as for our House, this is what we stand for. This is what we strive towards. I don’t how or what just yet: but I will think of something.
Respect is a big one. Respect for others as well as yourself. The feeds right into treating others the way you want to be treated. Ahhhh, if only all parents would take as much care in teaching their kids basic human kindness as you do. What a world we would have.
Hi Chris! We used to have house rules on the side of the refrigerator. I think it’s a great idea to have them written and available, so everyone is on the same page.
I really like the Golden Rule of treating everyone as they would like to be treated. It’s in the bible too!
Heading over to meet you on your guest site,
Ceil
I like your house rules.
Ours is basically the same. Only I have added stuff like, “Don’t take Mommy’s chocolate.”
You are such a good mom, Chris–raising then with the right values!
Your house rules seem perfect so far. Heading over now to check our your awesome words!
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WOOT!!!!! Thanks SO much Denise! I was THRILLED that my post was selected!! 🙂
our house rules are very much the same as yours. Kids learn life lessons at home first. Thanks for sharing with us at Mommy needs a time out Thursday!
Heading on over…Have you ever checked out valuesparenting.com. Love the Eyres – and all their suggestions. They suggest using the word “LAWS” instead of rules in your home. I like that concept a lot. A LAW implies that everyone has to do it, it is a way of living, a way to keep us all “safe” and protected. As my kids get older they seem to want to rebel on “rules” as they see them as things we have made up. Somehow a law carries more weight.
Oooh!! That sounds very interesting Leah… I will check it out. I can imagine that would carry more weight than ‘rule’. Thanks for your input my friend!
I think it’s so great you enforce house rules!! You are such a great mom!!! I can tell just from visiting your site!
Oh thanks so much Caroline!!!! We’re pretty wacky over here in how we DO enforce them though!! But that’s half the fun… 😉