I am utterly human. Full of flaws and weaknesses. I’m anxious, impatient, fidgety, and uncontrollably quirky. If you met me in person, you would probably be engulfed by a full-body hug, and feel that awkward invasion of boundaries I dare to cross over time and time again. I would want to please you, make you feel loved and comfortable in the moment of meeting. I would smile and look into your eyes and find a beautiful soul I so passionately want to understand and validate. I have a heart for people.
That’s my thing. I can give you a list of all the other traits I have that are less than worthy of your time. But I will tell you that I am deeply devoted to the hearts of people.
I used to think a lot about all the other things that make me lesser than…
Those insecurities still rise and fall with the moon. I used to let them hold me back, but I keep them at bay, now more than ever. They still lurk in those deep dark corners of my heart, trying to hold me captive, but I fight them with truth as best I can.
Because I’m learning as I grow older, that to celebrate the traits we have that are valuable, the gifts we’ve been given- is a much better use of our time. I’m discovering that even as I shake and tremble on my feet, even as I live this rather crazy life full of countless flaws and failures… I can still walk with the Lord.
I didn’t know that was allowed. I spent years, decades really- wondering if I will ever make it to that place of being useful, worthy of anything more significant to God. I spent years wondering how I could ever claim to be a follower of Jesus, or better yet- be a carrier of His light and love because I just couldn’t shine bright enough and couldn’t love hard enough. I didn’t feel “Godly“. If I’m not this perfect Christian, I surely can’t do the work of a perfect God.
So I thought.
Apparently, it’s not about shining our light, but all about shining His. And if we turn the switch on, it glows despite our demise.
I finally understand.
I am who I am, and that is enough.
For Him.
There is no defining moment of usefulness, confirmation, or arrival into what we deem valuable to God. He celebrates the gift of me, of you- always… And He can use even the tiniest trembling steps we take, for His greater purpose.
Each one of us.
I have marveled at this truth, over and over again- as I look in the mirror and see this crazy utterly inconceivable Christian and think “Huh”.
“Really? Me?”
And I hear Him whisper, “Yes, you. You are my creation. You are precious to me. You can carry My light and my love- just being you.”
“Huh.”
No hoops to leap through or seminary training or pious living here… apparently no need to be greater than I am.
Just me.
I long to learn more about this unearthly love I have been given, from the One who designed my innermost workings. And in my half-hearted attempt at wanting to be my best and do my best, my deepest desire is to do right by Him. And I trip over and over my own fumbling feet. I wobble and wiggle and squirm trying to ‘pray right, live right, grow right’ and I have yet to do any of that right.
And He STILL uses me.
“Huh.”
I’m betting He can still you use too.
In the smallest and largest of ways.
No need to wait or work to be that perfect Christian.
Right now, right where you are.
He wants to work through who you are.
Now.
Our God is madly in love with us and rejoices when we really understand this truth.
I think I finally get it.
Do you?
I love this and have to say you are definitely good enough and then some, Chris. I truly can’t say that enough and just so glad we are friends!! 😉
AW! I adore you, so so much Janine. And guess what sweetie? YOU are good enough TOO!!! SQUEE!!! 🙂 We all are. Oh, how I love that about God. He loves us RIGHT where we’re at. I for one, am SO grateful for that. <3
Love this!!! And you!
AW! I always LOVE seeing your sweet name and words here, honey!! I’m so glad you liked this one, Lynn! It was one of my *waytoolate at night inspirations*… you know it always comes then!! lol 😉
**Just me?***
amazing. unbelievable.
And he knows every hair on our head.
ME? WHY? Am I worth it? Really?
Yes. YES.
Love flowing to you, sweet Chris. xxxxxxxxxx
YES!!!! WE ARE ALL WORTH IT!! We are ALL WORTHY OF HIS LOVE!!! Oh, how I love you Kim. <3
Awesome!! Well done, sis. <3
Thanks so much sister!! I love you. <3
Nothing like turning 50 and watching the children leave the nest to make one focus on purpose.
I think the very essence of being human is the need to feel relevant. We strive to find importance in this world, until we suddenly realize that we are important to Someone so much greater.
Thanks for the reminder.
I love your perspective Juli… “I think the very essence of being human is the need to feel relevant. We strive to find importance in this world, until we suddenly realize that we are important to Someone so much greater.” TRUTH! I think we all need these reminders often! And I’m betting your purpose may shift now, yes? God be with YOU as you go forward into new terrain. 🙂 God’s got it all planned out for ya!
I know why he picked you – it is so evident. You are more than good enough! As for me – I will contemplate this on a different day, cause I’m definitely not feeling it today:).
One thing I’ve learned – you don’t need to FEEL it to BE it.
I have had you on my heart and in my prayers, Allie! We have all had those days… weeks… months… gosh, sometimes YEARS!! The best gift I think God gives us is His Love- *even on the hard days when we’re not feeling it* Remember that, okay?
I love this, Chrissy! A message with a reminder for all of us!
Thanks mom! I’m so glad you came by to read it and share such a wonderful comment!! YAY! 🙂 It’s my favorite message of all, really. How could it NOT be? <3
Chris, I can’t tell you how much I needed to simmer in these words today:
“Because I’m learning as I grow older, that to celebrate the traits of our greater good is much more worthy of our time.”
There are so many reasons for us to feel less than…and One reason to make us feel whole, known and More than enough.
It’s unfathomable really. It is.
What a miraculous gift and wonder this life is.
May we use it to bless others.
With heart and blossoming friendship,
Dani
Oh Dani… I always love your words, and your heart. “There are so many reasons to feel less than… and One reason to make us feel whole, known, and More than enough.” YES. It is unfathomable. But truth. *Chills* I simmer in this stuff a lot… it’s the best ‘pot’ to simmer in, right? Ah… 🙂
Oh, how I’m struggling with this right now, my friend. I am trying to embrace it, believe it. I want to embrace it, believe it. But, I’m struggling. I’ll get there. Someday.
And I love you for your honesty, sweetie. God does wonders with that. Lord KNOWS I have been there, and I’ll probably be there again. Here’s the beautiful thing about that… He knows exactly where you are. And guess what? He is madly in love with you right THERE. Feel it? It’s okay if you don’t… KNOW IT. The rest will come… in precious perfect time. Keep praying, okay? He’ll show up. He ALWAYS does. Promise. <3
I am enough. I remind myself of this almost every single day. And you know what? It’s true. It took a while to figure that out. xoxo
It IS true, isn’t it!! Oh, isn’t it a glorious feeling to have that ability to see our worth? I LOVE that you figured it out, Jennifer. Oh, how I love that! <3
Keep writing these, my lovely Kitty – I’m LEARNING.
Today I feel it. Another day I might not. But I don’t need to FEEL it to BE it.
And as for you…you are a trailblazer.
I love love LOVE that you are embracing SO much of what God *wants so badly* to give you, my precious Lizzi!! You are SO right about not needing to FEEL it to BE it. And when you take those shaky steps- just LOOK what God does. It lights me UP to see you set ABLAZE in His love!
Trailblazer… wow. I love you for your encouragement… wow. <3
“He is deeply in love with us” ! Yea once we get that it is kind of hard not to be deeply in love with him too. Awesome article!
Oh Serins! I am so deeply touched by your comment. It IS “kind of hard not to be deeply in love with him too.” Oh, how I love that! <3
Yes. This is the ‘truth’ I think. The pearl of wisdom He gives us if we will only look for it. Beautifully written. Thank you.
Cheryl, I’m so glad you came by!! Thank you for your beautiful response, my friend. I love that you ‘get it’. Oh, how I do! <3
forever imperfect; eternally forgiven!
we need tshirts of that.
you feed my soul my friend and give me the encouragement to keep pressing forward!! <3
Wow. What an incredible blessing to read your words Leslie! Wow. *I want those t shirts!* I remember a license plate I saw once that said, “Christians: We are perfect, just forgiven.” Yup. 😉
You are more than enough – you are such an amazing of a godly Christian woman!!!
And so are YOU, my dear friend. So are YOU. Always know that, okay? <3
“He can even use the tiniest, shakiest steps.” Love that Chris! He can and He will!
TRUTH!! It’s SO wonderful to connect with you again Joey!! I’ve MISSED YOU! (How did we ever lose touch? Gah!)
I get it, I think. Most days anyway. And on days I don’t I have you to remind me.
Dana, your words brought me to tears the first time I read them, and now once again. Oh, how I adore your heart! <3
I so love your heart and your brain and your words. You’re one of the most inspiring and positive people I know and I can’t wait to meet you in person and get that giant boundary-invading hug 🙂
Girl, it’s a comin’!!! I cannot WAIT to meet you too, Kristi!! That time can’t come soon enough… oh, how I wish we lived down the street from one another. Can you imagine? I love your brain and your words and your heart too. SO SO MUCH. <3 Thank you, love.
This so wonderful—I think you are very special. The world needs more people like you, who are brimming over with love and compassion and always working hard to make people feel happier about themselves. <3
Oh Marcia, how I adore you!! Your beautiful words are such an encouragement to me! SO grateful for them, and for YOU. <3
Love this Chris. My post “To the Mom Who Thinks She’s Not Enough” resonated with so many people but it was missing something… this! When we’re not enough, God is enough for us.
Thank you so much for sharing.
God bless you my friend.
xoxo
Exactly, Jennifer!!! EXACTLY!! That is surely a big missing piece! But that post was beautiful and encouraging all the same, my friend. 🙂
I’ve been learning that a lot lately.
By the way, I’m so much like you in person, EXCEPT for the full body hug thing. I’m so awkward!
And yet, I can’t wait to meet you and have this wonderful boundary-invading hug with you.
It’s a COMIN’ GIRL!!! Oh, gosh T- I just might have to mow you down to the ground with my hug, with all the anticipation to finally hug you!! *CannotWAITforthatmoment*
Enough, it feels good to read this cause many times in the past couple of years, I’ve heard Not Enough and these words don’t match with the idea that God love us fully and deeply. Your words are inspiring and beautiful Chris. They touched my heart deeply. I need to remember them when life is a bit messy or when I start thinking badly about myself. His love is the most beautiful and the one who can transform us. Stay blessed
Marie, I’m so glad you soaked in this truth my friend!! It’s an incredible thing to realize our God loves us DEEPLY and FULLY right where we are. May you feel that love today, and always. <3
I began laughing at the very beginning of your post. “If I met you in person I would probably engulf you in a full body hug…you may feel an invasion of boundaries.” Some probably would. So many people can’t accept expressions of love and that’s too bad because we need the expression of love so much these days. If that is the way God uses you in all your “quirkiness” then don’t you dare stop. Continue to spread the love, my sister.
Mary, THANK YOU for your sweet encouragement! I WILL! XOXO
Love this and love the reminder that God uses us where we are at! and love “I am what I am and that is enough”!
I love that it is so very true… Oh, thank GOD for that!! Thanks for coming by, my friend. 🙂
Amen!
Right? AMEN. 🙂
This is so utterly wonderful, and you in your people pleasing, hugging-no boundaries sort of way are adorable.
I hope to be the recipient of your hugs someday, and so very happy to hear you finally understand. Because with that understanding, I’m sure you’ll go on to bless many more people who cross your path!!
Warm hugs to you back for being the YOU God intended to let shine!!!
Aw Kathy!!! I just adore you, my new beautiful friend. I hope someday I can hug you FULLY with everything I got! 🙂 And oh, how my heart wants so desperately for everyone to truly get it. For all of us crazy frazzled sinners to realize that our God can do GREAT things through our broken and crazy lives… and our imperfect selves. I believe that is the key to truly understanding His Grace in it all. It is then that we can honestly shine it on others… 🙂
Wow, I see why this is one of your favorites. Having a heart for people is your great gift, I think, from what you have written. Little acts of great love is a path we can all take, because the great love comes from Him and pours through us – when we understand that it is not about us and our weaknesses or strengths. Bravo, Bravo. We all struggle with insecurities, but we must not dwell on them is we want to love ourselves, so that we can deeply love others.
Thank you so much for your beautiful response to this one, Hillary! I just love your perspective on this… *TRUTH*
Ah! Yes, beautiful! How different our lives are in Christ, how our sinfulness, insecurities, self-loathing melt into the arms of His great love..for me, this still both comforts and perplexes me, allowing joyful living to rise from despair and guilt at all the mistakes I made! I love your first paragraph describing yourself..so gorgeous!! When I think of the kind of friends I want in my life, it’s those that will hug me big and wide with no boundaries!! You are precious, and your writing speaks God’s truth of how much we are loved and accepted, no matter what!!
God Bless you!!
And God bless YOU, for your beautiful and loving heart Kathy. It’s really amazing, His Love. I don’t think we will every really *get it* because it is SO NOT human. I’m SO thankful it’s not human at all. We’d be in trouble, wouldn’t we!? 😉
I would love to meet you some day, Chris! I know my Lord also engulfs me in a full body hug,so I wouldn’t mind a hug from you.
thank you for the reminder that we are enough for HIm, rejoices with us, and still want to use us.
God bless
Diana
Aw I would LOVE to give you a full wrap around hug! 🙂 I’m so grateful you stopped by to read this one. It’s such a beautiful comfort to know how loved we are and how God can still use us right where we’re at with what we got!