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What is REALLY Behind a Facebook Status Update

November 12, 2014 By momcafe 55 Comments

 

I love Facebook, I really do. Every time I venture over there to catch up on the news of dear friends and blogging buddies, I find myself always oohing and aaahing over precious pictures and exciting updates. I would say about 80% of what I see is absolutely lovely. And I for one love good news and moments captured that are worth sharing with the world on social media! Heck, if and when I think about it- I sure love to announce great events and experiences myself.  How many of us can’t wait for the next facebook status update of our lives?

It’s just really neat to have an audience for our lives, isn’t it?

I also love people that share circumstances that need prayer or encouragement, because I’m one to dive in and start praying and encouraging. I get it. There are those times you just want to take a megaphone and say “Help me!” or “Help them!” or “Help him/her”.

I’m not too fond of the status updates that are political or slamming or rude or provocative in any nature. I’m also not a fan of inappropriate sexualized slander either. It’s just not my style.

One thing I do realize? We tend to share more of the good stuff, don’t we? And sometimes I wonder how good it really is behind the photos and words. I do. I would love to go into the homes of where those photos or updates were taken and hide in the closet and watch how things ‘really’ were going before and after that picture or announcement was posted. Is that weird? Stalker-ish weird? It’s more about the reality of things really. I’m not a stalker, but I am quite curious.

I am pretty transparent. I mean, my very first selfie on FB was of my ‘Toe grind” after the doc carved out my toenail. It was my most viewed post to this day. Yeah- apparently really really gross toes are wildly attractive to the masses. I got so many comments in the first ten minutes that I was laughing so hard I was crying because of them. Oh, it was hilarious!!! I think I made a lot of people gag that night. It was glorious, except for the beautiful Christian author I was promoting at the VERY SAME TIME on the very same social media outlet while my TOE kept popping up on the feed, because of the immediate freak out session going on in the comments.

Anyhoo…

My dear daughter was teaching my son how to cook macaroni and cheese the other day for his school project. It was just so sweet of her to offer to help him, I wanted to video tape it and take a picture to share with the world on Facebook! I mean, how precious is that? Right?

It started out wonderfully. She helped him read the directions and write down each step for his project with patience and careful planning. Unfortunately things digressed pretty quickly once the cooking actually started, and I thought to myself-

What if I actually posted the picture before this act of kindness grew nasty? If only they could see it now!

“I’m so proud of my kids!! Cassidy is teaching Cade how to make his favorite food! Adorable? YES!” #Bigsister #siblinglove

What is REALLY Behind A Facebook Status Update

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But what REALLY happened was this:

I never did post the picture… and even if I did, I wouldn’t think twice about it really.

But it is a bit deceptive, isn’t it?

If I knew how to post both the picture AND the video together…

I would post the picture as a cover shot for the video and say,

“Don’t they look so cute in the kitchen, these two? Boy, are YOU fooled! Press play to see what really happened. ” #Reality #Truth #Lifewithkids

I think those updates are much more fun anyway.

When the kids watched this video and another one that was even more brutal, they laughed and had a bit of a reality check themselves.

Cassidy, “Gosh mom, I sound like a brat!  I hope I’m not that awful.  Will you tell your blog readers that I’m not that bad?”

Cade, “I love it mom!  I’m really cute in this!”

 

(Friends, Cass really isn’t that bad- usually.  And well, Cade IS quite adorable always.  Even when he is terribly annoying.)

 

Linking up with the wonderful Shine Blog Hop!

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Filed Under: Encouragement in Expression, Encouragement in Laughter Tagged With: Facebook, Highlight reel, laughter, parenting, Reality

Comments

  1. Stephanie says

    November 12, 2014 at 3:13 am

    Ahaha! I love the honesty and keeping it real. Moooommmmmm. Geez. Oh, I remember acting the exact same way.

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 7:16 pm

      Always keeping it real… Because that what life is!! Oh, if I could film it all… 😉

      Reply
  2. Alison says

    November 12, 2014 at 3:27 am

    Bahahaha!
    I love reality, a look behind the scenes. Thank you for staying real, Chris (and Cassidy & Cade).

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 7:15 pm

      I love the behind the scenes so much too, Alison! It’s where we all meet. It’s real- life is real- so why be anything but real? 🙂

      Reply
  3. Janine Huldie says

    November 12, 2014 at 3:29 am

    Chris, I loved that video and life really does unfold before our eyes. And trust me as much as my girls do love each other, they totally have their snarky moments with each other, too!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 7:14 pm

      Who doesn’t have those snarky moments?! Right? 🙂

      Reply
  4. another jennifer says

    November 12, 2014 at 3:38 am

    Love the contrast between the video and the photo! Too funny. I can always count on you keeping things real on your FB feed, Chris. But that toe? Ugh. I shutter just thinking about it!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 7:14 pm

      BWAHAHAHAHA!!! I laughed at your comment a long time ago, and I now laugh at it again. Yeah- BEST SELFIE EVER!!! 😉

      Reply
  5. misssrobin says

    November 12, 2014 at 6:10 am

    Life with kids changes on a dime, doesn’t it? Just when we’re all proud of our parenting because our kids are taking care of each other, one of them threatens to kill the other one. You’re definitely not alone.

    There are so many things I love about facebook and just a few I hate. As long as the love outweighs the hate I’ll stay.

    See you on facebook!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:45 pm

      SO true Robin!!! Lets definitely hope the love outweighs the hate always, my friend! <3

      Reply
  6. Considerer says

    November 12, 2014 at 7:03 am

    Bwaahahhahahaha they’re both GORGEOUS. So are you 😀 I love the ‘reality check’.

    (also, to clarify – you’re a alright with APPROPRIATE sexualised slander…? 😉 )

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:43 pm

      I totally LOLed when I first read this comment, Lizzi!!! ‘APPROPRIATE’ is the key there. But wait- what exactly IS appropriate? Hmm… 😉

      Reply
      • Considerer says

        December 1, 2014 at 10:57 pm

        *grins* So glad I made you laugh.

        I think the hey to ‘appropriate’ is knowing what iSN’T! So I won’t tell my blowjob joke here 😉

        Reply
  7. Tammy says

    November 12, 2014 at 7:43 am

    Hahaha! My kids are NEVER like that!….except sometimes ; ) Very true though, sometimes my posts don’t show the whole picture – and I’m cool with that. I’ll invite the world into my beautiful moments, and MY world into my not-so-lovely ones. So glad you’re part of my world WPB!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:41 pm

      Yeah- I think my world has gotten bigger! Its cool. I’m okay with exposing some of our stuff, if it provides a message or has some meaning to it all. It’s worth the risk for me- with this blog- ya know? BUT- those really private parts- those are reserved for my besties- like YOU. <3

      Reply
  8. christine says

    November 12, 2014 at 12:33 pm

    Oh my word, that is hilarious! And true. Not too many people like to admit on FB that their families aren’t perfectly perfect in every way.
    Tell Cass that your readers still think she’s the bee’s knees. 🙂

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:40 pm

      I am going to tell Cass that RIGHT NOW- she’s home sick with me, while I respond to comments… playing catch up in the biggest way. Inch by inch. I’m glad you get it, Christine!! Who doesn’t have it real? There is simply no perfect.

      Reply
  9. Robin Kramer says

    November 12, 2014 at 2:06 pm

    Such a good reminder that when dealing with social media, what you see isn’t always the whole story.

    I LOVE the behind-the-scenes video, Chris! (This could be MY family!)

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:38 pm

      It is something we all have behind the scenes of our ‘best moments’, right? I don’t know any other way to engage with people, than keeping it real. 🙂

      Reply
  10. Tamara says

    November 12, 2014 at 8:22 pm

    haha.. he is adorable in it. She’s adorable too, despite her big sister yelling. Scarlet is well-versed in that.
    Most of my photos are just that wonderful. Life is a fairy tale, isn’t it???
    Just kidding. My photos are me being sneaky in the in-betweens of whining, scowling and other things. With Scarlet.
    Des is really that delightful.

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:36 pm

      Your photos capture the BEAUTY of the moment… I just love that so much. <3

      Reply
  11. Kim says

    November 12, 2014 at 8:35 pm

    This made me laugh because I can totally relate!!!
    And, I know it’s because I’m an outsider but I didn’t think Cassidy sounded bratty – she sounded like a big sister trying to help her little brother:) Cade is very cute!!
    I’m with you – I always want to know what went on behind the scenes (or maybe I don’t)!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:35 pm

      You are too sweet Kim!! I will tell Cass that… 🙂 I really DO want to know behind the scenes… that is the only way I can relate to people, really. <3

      Reply
  12. Meredith says

    November 12, 2014 at 8:36 pm

    I am so with you! The leading photos can feel so empty and the political/controversial stuff just isn’t my style…your kind of status update is mine!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 7:24 pm

      ‘Cause we are REAL!!! 🙂 The only way to go…

      Reply
  13. The Dose of Reality says

    November 12, 2014 at 11:30 pm

    Bwahahahaha!! I LOVE THE VIDEO!! It’s just *so* real!! This could totally be my house!! I love that you peeled back the curtain for us and are keeping it real, girl! 😀 –Lisa

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:32 pm

      You KNOW that keepin’ it real is the only way, Lisa!! Who can connect with the ideal? No one. 🙂

      Reply
  14. michelle says

    November 13, 2014 at 1:10 am

    This is so adorable. And real is better than all the fakebook posts we all see every day.

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:31 pm

      I think so too Michelle. Real is so much better! Who can engage with ideal? Not me…

      Thanks so much for coming by, I’m SO thankful!! 🙂

      Reply
  15. Lisa @ The Golden Spoons says

    November 13, 2014 at 3:01 am

    I love that! Just today, my two oldest were at the horseback riding lesson and my oldest was actually helping her younger sister groom the horse. Another mom commented something about how sweet it was and she bet they were best of friends. I actually laughed out loud and told her that, usually, they are more like oil and water. I could have posted that pic on FB, but it’s not reality. I think people want to share the good (i.e. boast) and hide the not-so-good (which is actually mostly just normal.)

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:27 pm

      Aw!! That’s so sweet that your oldest was helpful! Yeah- I feel for those who simply feel like they can’t be honest… it reveals that they have a need to be perfect or prove something, which is sad to me. Everyone has an underbelly! Life isn’t perfect- far from it.

      Reply
  16. Allie Smith says

    November 13, 2014 at 1:07 pm

    Yes, the happy, happy, happy posts can be hard to read, especially the ones from a friend who calls daily to complain about how miserable she is. I call ir fakebooking;)

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:23 pm

      Oh, that is the WORST Allie. I have such a hard time with people who put a ‘face’ on and then growl on the side. Just wrong.

      Reply
  17. Katy @ Experienced Bad Mom says

    November 13, 2014 at 2:06 pm

    I love the honesty, the reality! We need more of it. To your point, I just posted a FB update about my 11yo calling me from middle school because he forget his book fair money. I actually thought twice about posting it because 1) it gives some moms the idea that their kid is better than mine because theirs would never forget their book fair money and 2) what kind of mom am I that my son forgets his book fair money. Now, I know those thoughts are ridiculous, but I had them nonetheless. But I posted it because I thought it was funny – and a real moment. He forgot his book fair money and thought we would just drop everything to bring him some. Really? Actually, maybe his dad did! I’m at work and can’t. 🙂 BTW, your two in the video make me feel better about my two –same type of interactions go on at our house every day!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:22 pm

      Now see? I would laugh hysterically at your post and TOTALLY relate to it!! What kid DOESN’T forget stuff? And I am totally comfortable sharing the ‘underbelly’ for the most part – of our lives, because really? I KNOW everyone has one. 🙂

      Reply
  18. Jhanis says

    November 13, 2014 at 4:59 pm

    I can totally relate! I don’t post a lot on my personal acct but if I will talk about everything that goes wrong in our house daily, I’d beat all the nanowrimo participants! Hahahahaha!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:20 pm

      BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Me too, Jhanis! Oh me too, girl! Thanks for making me laugh. I needed it. 🙂

      Reply
  19. MB says

    November 13, 2014 at 5:45 pm

    So true! Yes, I welcome the honesty. It’s like we censor ourselves with social media, but I’d really rather hear/see about the grit. Maybe it would bring us all together in a more positive way. Visiting from SHINE Blog Hop.

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:20 pm

      Exactly!! I am much more engaged with the people who show their reality than those who cover it up- and that connection is authentic. 🙂

      Reply
  20. Rorybore says

    November 14, 2014 at 4:41 am

    totally my house.
    that’s why I kick them all out of the kitchen when I cook. ha
    But showing them the video so they could see – brilliant.

    and now I really want some Kraft dinner. 🙂

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:09 pm

      I think I am going to video tape them more often- and enjoy the play back and the disgrace on their faces!!

      I got some Kraft boxes just waiting to be made for you, girl!! Or- we can ask the kids to make it and watch the show! 😉

      Reply
  21. Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life says

    November 14, 2014 at 5:51 am

    I was chuckling but the escalation can get far worse here! LOL. I should record them! That was brilliant!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:07 pm

      Well, you didn’t see the FOLLOWING video I taped continuing this drama… one which my dear daughter would not allow to be published. It got a bit U.G.L.Y. Such is life with kids- oh, and ME! lol

      Reply
  22. Pattie says

    November 14, 2014 at 12:00 pm

    Chris,
    I love when people #AirbrushTheirLives as they climb the social media ladder. That’s what I call it, anyway. They only show the best parts, smoothing over the zit of a kid fight and the muffintop of life so everyone will think that they live a glamorous life. Thank you for the honesty! And the video! P.S. Both of your kids are really cute.

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 6:05 pm

      Thanks so much Pattie!! I always fear those people who can’t be transparent are trying to live up to their idea of ‘perfect’ – and there is simply no such thing. Why not embrace it all? This is life. Lows and highs and everything in between. 🙂

      Reply
  23. Jennifer | The Deliberate Mom says

    November 16, 2014 at 9:08 pm

    LOL – loved this Chris.

    Yes! The reality! I share lots… including photos of my kids’ messes.

    I never want someone to think I have a “picture perfect” life but I also think that we need to look at things realistically and KNOW that no one’s life is perfect.

    Your kids are adorable – so glad they survived the Mac N’ Cheese fiasco!

    Thanks for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop).

    Wishing you a lovely day.
    xoxo

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 5:08 pm

      Absolutely Jennifer!! Our lives are all a hot mess at times and no one is perfect- good LORD knows. 🙂

      Reply
  24. Rabia @TheLiebers says

    November 20, 2014 at 1:12 pm

    I’m so glad you posted this!! This is what my kids sound like too! I wonder if recording them and then playing it back to them would make a difference? I have had similar incidents with my photos. I once took a photo of my boys holding hands walking down the soccer field. Literally two second after I took the picture they were punching each other and yelling. Oy!!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 4:48 pm

      HA!! That is SO typical Rabia!! That happens with my kiddos ALL the time too! 🙂

      Reply
  25. Sandy Ramsey says

    November 25, 2014 at 12:51 am

    Yep. Sounds an awful lot like our house sometimes. I think I need to video one of the more epic fights. You did much better than I do at mediating. I’m just a little bit louder 🙂

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      December 1, 2014 at 2:54 pm

      You just caught me in a good mood with it all, Sandy!! Lord knows I have had ‘those little bit louder’ moments!!! 😉

      Reply
  26. Tarana says

    January 12, 2015 at 8:16 pm

    I do wonder why we only share the good things. I do that too, but I know that this isn’t going to do us any good. Lovely story, by the way!

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      January 21, 2015 at 7:37 pm

      I think many ‘negative’ things in our lives are more private and not worthy of ‘publishing’ for all to see. At least I won’t share lots of my personal or family issues/conflicts if it involves other people. To me, it’s a respect issue and a TMI issue. I for one, have some pretty set boundaries.

      Reply
  27. Meredith says

    January 12, 2015 at 11:41 pm

    I struggle with this really. MOSTLY because I have been accused of sharing too much of the negative side of things. There is a fine balance. We need to try to be honest, and real, but at the same time, uplifting and positive. I think you balance both quite nicely. 🙂

    Reply
    • momcafe says

      January 21, 2015 at 7:34 pm

      YOU? Too negative? That doesn’t seem accurate to me. But yes- I suppose there is a fine line between the two. I never ‘track’ my posts… it’s just our lives and sometimes it IS more negative and other times it’s HUGELY POSITIVE!! That. Is. Life.

      Reply

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