By now, those who have the glorious privilege of being in love are recovering from a weekend of realizing that significant blessing in their lives. I for one, have celebrated it realizing: Love Is In The Leftovers, and telling my daughter about love: Don’t settle For Anything Less. I am deeply blessed to have a man that loves me, takes care of me and honors me.
However, it’s always this time of year that my heart stretches beyond my swooning heart and reaches into the lives of the broken-hearted. We all have many people in our lives who have a desperate ache this time of year, whatever the circumstances. I for one, have precious close friends who are experiencing a pain they never thought they would have. This weekend found them trembling with fear, questioning their future, and wondering how in the world they ended up alone. Their pain penetrates deep into their crumbled hearts, for a love that has died. It had crashed and burned on the tundra of heavy worn years of decay. Over 30 years of marriage, and it’s all over. An entire life filled with hopes and dreams for their children, and beyond such wonder is the fulfillment of growing old together. Gone.
All gone.
I have spent a lot of time praying for those dear friends of mine, and the countless others who have to suffer the heartache of having a life without love. As Valentine’s Day rolls around, I find myself thinking about the friends I know in loveless marriages, and so many more that have succumbed to living alone forever. I always feel compelled to do something for them… something. Anything to help them at least feel loved by me.
One year I sent a dozen roses to a friend who continued to yearn for a better marriage, and found herself hopeless. I knew she wouldn’t be getting anything romantic for Valentine’s Day, so I changed that. I pray it helped.
This year, amidst flying around town doing errands and swinging through school functions… I knew I had to do something for at least ONE of my friends. My heart was so heavy for her, facing this first Valentine’s Day alone. I decided to ‘exit out’ of one activity at school to run a few more stops to deliver on her doorstep some tokens of love.
A super size dark chocolate bar. A lovely valentine. And a big framed poster about the love of friendship.
It wasn’t enough to mend her broken heart, this I know. But it was something in place of an empty day. I prayed it would be at least that.
I have not stopped thinking about her, and another friend whom I adore- going through such incredibly difficult turns in their life. Life without love… is hard enough. But after having a life full of love, and then losing it? And watching it shatter into a million sharp toxic pieces? Perhaps worse.
Would you do me a favor? I would just love for you to join me in sharing love with anyone in your life that is suffering from a broken empty heart. It could be as simple as a prayer, a phone call, or a sweet note. Even now, after the ‘big day’ has passed… it’s still worth something.
There are people who are fulfilled without a significant love in their life, and they may feel complete and at peace about their circumstances. Good for THEM! I absolutely honor that.
It’s those whose hearts are longing for love. Longing for what is lost. Or longing for what could be…
Lets all add a little love to their hearts today. Maybe, just maybe…
They won’t feel love-less.
I’ve never been invested in Valentine’s day, even when I’ve had a partner – because it’s a day that makes people feel bad. BUT – I know that it’s a significant day for many and that there are those who take it personally when that day comes and they do not have someone to share it with. I respect that and admire that you used the day to express love for one of your friends who is in pain right now.
I also feel a shout out from you in between the lines of your last few posts, Chris – not gonna lie 🙂 I can just picture you typing away late in the night in your mansweater – worried about my heart. Love you my friend.
GOT ME!!!! 😉 You are on my mind so often and in my heart ALWAYS… and I actually LOVE that you read between the lines. LOVE. Because that is often threaded with intention for you, dear friend. XOXOXO
While wearing my man sweater…;)
I will totally join you on this and you know that this time of year is a bit hard on me having experienced the loss of three of my grandparents in the month of February alone and my grandfather having actually passed on Valentine’s Day. So, I am all for spreading love and sunshine to brighten others days right about now. Will have to brainstorm, but truly do love this idea, Chris!! 🙂
It sure sounds like this month would be a good month for friends to spread some love and shine it on YOU!! Bless your heart!! I do hope you feel loved as you muddle through those losses and the feelings that surround this month, my friend.
You’re so beautiful. I will do this..right now, in fact. Although it’s a bit early in the morning for anyone to see my smiling face and hear my smiling voice!
I do hope you found a way to love on someone Tamara!!! I’m sure you used your gift of creativity and passion to make someone’s dark day brighter, my friend!
Lovely. Thank goodness your friends who are going through a difficult time have someone like you in their lives. Sometimes we just need a reminder that we are lovable and that life isn’t over. I think you and I had similar thoughts about how we improve on Valentine’s Day. It can be a tough time of year.
We surely did have similar thoughts Jennifer!! I love that. 🙂
I do love your heart for the lost and loveless.
I’ll keep a weather eye 🙂
And I so love yours, sweet Lizzi. Oh, how I love yours. 🙂
I *may* just get the chance to be eternally thankful for that…
There ain’t no MAY in SALVATION… no GREY in SALVATION. It’s ALL in. And ALL in HIM.
But I’ll take hanging out for eternity with you… snowball tackles and all. 😉
*snorks with laughter* There better be snowballs in heaven then, is all I have to say to that
I always feel like we pay too much attention to Valentine’s Day. We seem to create so much pressure to have that perfect love. But I appreciate your sentiment, Chris. No one deserves to be loveless any time of the year. I will do my best to add a little love to those who need it.
It’s just such a “day” for so many… it breaks my heart to think of those who hurt so badly and suffer more just thinking about being alone… 🙁
What a great idea Chris! Love your giving, Texas-sized heart!
And I love YOUR Texas sized heart too, my dearest friend!!! XOXO
Too true. I am searching high and low for something I read years ago – someone sent it to me when I was in a period of “everyone has love in their life but me” and I needed to hear it. I believe it was written by a nun. I believe it quoted C.S. Lewis’ words about being surprised by joy. I believe it was about love being other-centered and thinking more about loving than about being loved. I can’t find it anywhere. The person who sent it to me doesn’t remember where it came from or have it anymore. And so I keep looking…
It sounds incredible and very biblical Lisa. Outward eyes- reaching out to those around us is a gift and there is huge growth in doing that. Having ‘others centered focus’ is how God wants us to live!
Beautiful post, SSSF! Couldn’t have said it any better. Lobe you! XO! ~A~
I bet your heart is just like this, SSSF. SO big and beautiful, it is. XOXOXO
Beautiful Chris! I am not a fan of Valentine’s day because I think we should tell people we love them EVERY day. But, I love the way you have taken he day and used it as an opportunity to focus on a different kind of love – friendship & compassion. You are a gem my friend!
I think it’s a perfect time for loving our precious friends as well as anyone else in our life that is deserving of our attention!! There are people everywhere that need our love… we just need to take the time and effort to give it. 🙂
This is why you are quickly becoming my mentor (and you didn’t even know, did you?)!!! I love that you took time out of your busy schedule to try and make someone’s day just a bit better. And, yes, I will definitely join you – I know that there are several people that I can try and give a smile to this week.
SHUT UP!!! Oh Kim! You are such a sweetheart to say that!!! I am completely honored to read your precious comment, my friend!! Thank you thank you thank you….
I’m not a big fan of holidays that exclude people. I think Valentine’s Day is one of them. I wish that there were some way to better include platonic love in it.
Yeah… it’s a hard one, for sure- because it does exclude people. And those are usually the people that need love more than anyone, really. Ugh. We can change it and make it right while we take the time to love on those that need it!
You are so beautiful. I remember the painful days, so my heart is right with those who are still suffering. Hope is what we can give them. Hope that they will one day feel the love that they deserve.
And I pray for that for so many… so many. Ugh. Breaks my heart for those who don’t feel loved. 🙁
You are such a sweet and thoughtful soul, Chris. I need to reach out to my friends who might be lonely this time of year. Thanks for the reminder. You do know that people’s lives are richer with you in them, right? 🙂
AW!!!!!! Do YOU know that your words penetrate my heart and TRULY make me feel like what I am doing, giving and trying with all my heart is worthy? Oh dear friend- you YOU make my MY life richer. Thank you for blessing me with YOUR beautiful encouragement… every time, I seriously gasp with love and appreciation and thanks. Every single time.
Just beautiful Chris. You are truly one of the best friends anyone could ever hope to have. :)-Ashley
AW!!! Thanks SO much Ashley!!! I know you are that kind of friend too… that’s why I adore you. 🙂
Awww Chris, you’re the sweetest girl!!! Just like you to ALWAYS be thinking about others! My husband and I had to take notice of this, as we have more than a few single women in our congregation. We make it a point on Valentine’s to be inclusive and to not make it so much about lovey dovey, as to not make anyone feel left out. But focus more on the love of Christ! We save the lovey-dovey for behind closed doors, lol! have a good one hon! Love ya!! 🙂
Oh how I LOVE that idea, Michell!!! Perfectly brilliant in every way!! The part about the love of CHRIST- not the behind the closed doors love- which is of course something I am a BIG fan of!! LOLOL But the love of Christ is truly even a ‘one up’ on that!! 😉
You are simply amazing Chris. What a loving, amazing thing to do. You are an unusual beacon of light in this often dark world.
As are you, my friend. As are YOU. 🙂
Thank you from the bottom of my heart, dear friend. XOXO
Oh Chris…the sweet way you love on others touches me so much. Thanks for the reminder of the importance of finding ways to care for the precious friends God put in our lives.
Thanks hun! I could have picked about 400 more, but narrowed it down and love my final picks… they are all true writing talents! 🙂
It’s truly reciprocal isn’t it? I have been loved by countless friends through difficult times in my life, and I absolutely am compelled to do the same. Friendships are treasures to behold and care for always… 🙂
Chris, My very best friend recognized my bad day this week and sent me flowers. I am so lucky to have her in my life!! I am not without love, but we all have hard days and this week I had a particularly bad one. But it ended with a smile thanks to her and that makes me feel even more loved than before.
And THAT is the best blessing of all… friendship is exactly that, Rabia!! I love that your best friend was able to be there for you- and make your bad day beautiful!! LOVE that!!! 🙂
You’re such a good friend Chris! I love that about you!
Muah!
You’re such a LOVE LOVE LOVE!!! Talk about a good friend… girl! How you have BLESSED me, let me COUNT the ways. XOXOXOXO (I miss you like crazy)