I am not a good “sick person”. I moan and groan and complain that I need to “get things done” and hate to cancel activities in my life. I stagger around the house attempting to push productivity, as I force myself forward without forfeiting the loss of time. I begrudgingly reflect on the dinner gathering I was supposed to host, the Sunday School class that I should have taught, and the important meeting I couldn’t make. Oh woe is me…
I consider being sick a waste of time.
A total inconvenience.
A kink in my plan.
A detour and distraction.
It’s awful to accept and down right miserable to surrender to sickness.
And if you’re a mom, it’s almost impossible.
So there I was, thinking if I can just get this and that done… If I can make sure this was here and that was there… If I can manage a survival plan for my kids…
Then I would allow myself to rest. I was that sick.
So I plopped on my bed in such pain I couldn’t find comfort in my soft pillow and supple sheets. I tossed and turned in a fatigue-induced fury. I agonized over what I could and should be doing with this restless time…
And then it hit me.
God has a way of pouring conviction right into the very heart of who I am. He’s Good like that.
I heard Him Whisper…
“This is temporary. Pray for those who endure longsuffering.”
I lay still in silent surrender. My frenzied mind stopped and my thoughts turned to each person I know that suffers agonizing days over and over again. My angst immediately transformed into a passionate prayer, as I named each precious soul I know that is held captive of some medical ailment or another. I pleaded for God to provide strength for them and their families. I begged for His Healing. I lifted up every name I could think of, and added those I don’t know personally to the list. My heart was heavy and my eyes wet from weeping.
I used my pain for a purpose.
From now on, when I am ill and need to rest… I will realize that the time I offer up in prayer for people in pain is truly time well spent.
Prayer is very productive. I can always show up for that.